The Hush-Hush Mentality

I believe that as a society we have been socialized not to talk about our imperfections or any of the negative aspects in our lives. I know I was. I believe that many people in our world believe that if they don’t say it out loud then a) maybe it won’t be true and b) that no one else will know. But the reality of the situation is that a) this stuff (whatever your stuff happens to be) doesn’t go away and b) this stuff is very true. This stuff is real --- and it can be painful.

So you can imagine what that kind of socialization does to a girl like me----an infertile one and furthermore a girl whose IVF process did not end with a beautiful bouncing baby the way she expected it to. Looking back I now see that I spent nearly $100,000 and three years chasing a dream. But the dream wasn’t of a child. The dream was to be pregnant. And the funny thing is that I never really wanted to be pregnant. It wasn’t the pregnancy I was chasing ---it was the normalcy.

And in the end? How did it all turn out? The minute I held Jake all my dreams came true. The logistics don’t seem so important anymore.

The hush-hush mentality? I think we’re done with that.

Love much,
xob